The weather is spectacular. It's cloudy, it rains and winds so fiercely. I just stood on my balcony for a while, the wind blew through me and I cried. I could smell pines, fresh grass and the wet ground, rain. Such a beautiful, bitter sweet moment. And I was so alone, only with the universe around me and within me.

Sometimes in the night I wake up suddenly to a fear, of existential loneliness, of being so very alone. I am not alone, if I don't want to be. But this is different, I feel this longing within me... to be found in an extraordinary way, to be seen in an unique way, to be seen wholly by someone and to be loved truly.

Photo by Christopher Martin.

"It’s dark because you are trying too hard. Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly. Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply. Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them. I was so preposterously serious in those days… Lightly, lightly – it’s the best advice ever given me…So throw away your baggage and go forward. There are quicksands all about you, sucking at your feet, trying to suck you down into fear and self-pity and despair. That’s why you must walk so lightly. Lightly my darling…"

- Aldous Huxley